This blog is for me. If you're reading it, that's your business. It's just easier for me to type than to write in a journal. Does that make me lazy? Who cares. Usually I'm kind of a spaz, so I can be lazy about writing if I feel like it.

I am really just trying to waste time. I'm supposed to be working, but I am SO unmotivated. I just can't seem to do what I need to do.

Life is full of ups and downs these days.

Ups:

• D and I are getting married in 142 days (according to our website- I am NOT psycho enough to keep track of that stuff myself).
• My sweet dog- the best friend a girl could have
  
• I got a new job! 6th grade humanities- here I come
• I am relatively healthy
• I live in San Francisco- enough said
• I have a roof over my head, enough to eat, and one killer pair of jeans
• I have wonderful friends and a kick-ass sister
• I have more beautiful bikes than a girl could hope for
  

Downs:

• I can't kick this flu/cold thing, which is weird b/c I'm never sick for more than 24 hours.
• D is in Salem; his dad just had bypass surgery and is not doing well
• I can't seem to write progress reports. I'm distracted. By the above downs, but also by a million other things. I think that I work well with ADD/ADHD kids b/c I'm the same way. We understand each other.
  

So if that's all I have to complain about, not so bad, eh? Hopefully D's dad will pull through and that will be added to the list of ups. I could go on and on about my mom, but don't really feel like it these days. I guess that's an up too. I'm beginning to realize that I only have so much power/control to help others, especially if they won't help themselves. Realizations come and go though. I won't be able to hold onto that one forever. Maybe not even for long. But for now, I'm glad to feel that way. For now I am going to let myself experience acceptance.

Shit, I should go to yoga. Jonathan always helps me experience acceptance. Can I motivate? That is the question of the day. We shall see...